Effective Communication is the foundation of relationships. It is the most important (and often-times difficult) skill for having and keeping healthy relationships. These relationships include spouse, children, siblings, parents, grandparents, nephews, friends, colleagues, bosses, employees, acquaintances, strangers, social groups. In short, you are communicating with anyone with whom you have contact.

Communicating effectively can be one of the hardest and most difficult things we do. It can be so frustrating and debilitating to not be understood when things are so obvious to you. “I keep explaining myself and they refuse to get it!” “Why can’t they just leave me alone!” “I’ve tried everything and they just won’t listen to me.”

I take a needs-based approach to communication coaching. This means that we focus on the needs of both parties in the relationship, identify which needs are and are not being met, and devise solutions and strategies to help ensure that the needs of both are met. Only when these needs are met can a healthy relationship exist and prosper. And there is nothing sweeter than enjoying a healthy and connected relationship.

The Wrong Approach

The society we live in has taught us the wrong way to communicate, or rather, has not taught us how to effectively communicate. Avoidance, forcefulness, intimidation, acquiescence, submissiveness, peer-pressure are some tactics we have all tried in our relationships. The problem with each of them is that they do not focus on needs and lead to deterioration in the relationship. They might work better for one side at the detriment of the other. They may alienate both sides and add distance. For a relationship to remain healthy, different strategies are needed.

A Better Approach

Effective communication requires understanding both parties needs. You cannot focus on just one side. Needs can include love, respect, consideration, admiration, etc. Each one of us interacts based on whether or not our needs are being met. If our needs are not being met, conflict arises. When our needs are met, we are able to express ourselves clearly and to provide for the needs of others.

I’d Love to Hear From You

If you are struggling with communicating with an important person in your life, I may be able to help. Effective communication skills in are not something we are born with and most of us did not learn them growing up or in school. But the skills can be learned with the help of an experienced coach. I have helped hundreds of others improve their communication, Call to set up an appointment to see if I can help you.